


Hallucinogenic

by ozomin



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Drug Addiction, Drug Withdrawal, Fluff, M/M, Recreational Drug Use, descriptions of drug use, drug mention, everything is consensual do not worry, sex while high
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-22
Updated: 2018-04-22
Packaged: 2019-04-20 04:12:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14252799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ozomin/pseuds/ozomin
Summary: Baekhyun mistakes an opium den for an antique shop. While looking for a tea canister he finds someone much more intriguing.





	Hallucinogenic

**Author's Note:**

> Ticket No. 498  
> Warnings: Recreational Drug Use, Drug Addiction, Drug Withdrawal,  
> Pairing: Zhang Yixing/Byun Baekhyun  
> Side Pairing(s): if you squint there's some chansoo  
> Time Period: mid 1800s  
> Author's Note: Naturally, to accommodate this situation, manipulating this area of Korea into more of a trade location was necessary and was as a result modeled loosely on Hong Kong in the 1800s. To my pcy and liz: thanks for getting me through this it was a journey. To my prompter: This was yet another challenge for me but I was so intrigued by the prompt i had it try it. Thank you for this opportunity all I can say is that I hope you enjoy it. Also me @ y'all: don't do opiods.

Baekhyun's always wanted a gold filigree tea canister, porcelain with blue ink buildings painted along the sides and curves. Without it, the jasmine blend he's been getting from one of the corner markets at a fraction of the price before it's sent off to Britain on the next available ship, is without a proper place. Baekhyun would never allow it. 

The streets of Hwaseong are tightly packed shops and apartment buildings, mazes of tea houses and flea markets. Baekhyun swears he saw a antique shop around here somewhere. He's half venturing into the crosshairs of one of the denser areas when he spots the innocuous door that resembles that of a gate of one of the walled villages, though the brick layering is much neater. There's a red banner down one side that reads "courtesy in kind." Baekhyun narrows his eyes. It sounds vaguely familiar, familiar enough that in lieu of having made the recollection completely up on his own, he heads towards it. Besides that's definitely the phrase an antique shop would use in respect of their wares isn't it? 

Baekhyun straightens the collar of his coat, and slowly eases the door open with small fingers. 

What he is met with isn't the counters of fragile glass and copper vases he expected but instead, his eyes are drawn to the thread of carpet, shimmering bright red beneath a series of bronze gas chandeliers overhead.

"May I help you?" 

Baekhyun's caught off guard by the ruffle of black hair peeking around a threshold of a room to Baekhyun's left. He looms over Baekhyun as he comes forward. 

Baekhyun simply stares, he's too caught up in the polished cherry wood of the hall tables, up top them gorgeous jeweled goblets from what looks like the European renaissance; the decorative tea sets, clean and sharp copper and silver and gold, what looks to be ruby insets in the handles and pressed into the center of the winding patterns that border the serving trays. 

His eyes flick twice between the tall glass vases of chamomile and the man's face before settling on him. 

"...Do you sell antiques?" Baekhyun starts feebly, he has an inkling he already knows the answer to that question. The table nearest the tall man is the only one sheathed in crushed velvet, the drawer handles are brushed brass with gorgeous golden insets. The flowers are snipped cream roses. 

The mans brows only furrow. He presses his lips into a tight line. "Does this look like an antique shop to you?" His expression is furtive. When Baekhyun shakes his head, if only to avoid trouble he continues, "At least you've been honest. I'd be hard pressed to let you convince me to check the client list," He frowns satisfied. 

Baekhyun can only follow his every expression with almost owlish eyes.

"You wouldn't happen to know any around here would you?" Baekhyun starts, smiling. 

The man's expression only becomes more unreadable, he sighs deeply, Baekhyun can see his youth in the supple stretch of his cheeks, the way his eyes still shine even when he doesn't want them to. 

"I'm sure while you mean well," he goes stern again just as fast, "this is a private establishment I'm gonna have to ask you to--"

"But Hyung, you really don't have to--" Baekhyun looks past the taller man towards the door that's just opened down the hall. Out comes another man just as tall if not taller than the one currently stopping Baekhyun. He's got a ruffle of roasted brown hair and a matching suit. Baekhyun makes the mistake of peering past that large body and into the room. 

The swirl of smoke across the ceiling is lit up by the gas lamp chandelier above his head. It looks like clouds back lit by the rising sun. 

That man standing there in the doorway with half brushed back hair and polished shoes, the angel. 

He has sleepy eyes that lock so sharply onto Baekhyun, he almost takes a step back. 

"Who's this?" The second taller man says smiling, his grin is broad and shiny like the gaslamps. 

"Don't you have work to do Chanyeol?" The first one says lips still pressed tight.

Chanyeol huffs, eyes wide, "I'm still Hyung to you--" with that he reaches up and pinches the first man's ear between his thumb and forefinger. It does not appear to have any force behind it because all the first man does is roll his eyes and sigh in excess. 

"Come on Sehun, is he a new client?" Chanyeol asks letting go, he looks Baekhyun up and down and noticing how the tense in this hall has completely broken thanks to Chanyeol, all Baekhyun can do is stare past both of them back into that room at the lean man looking back at him. 

"He--is not." Sehun says pushing Chanyeol's hands further back to himself and away from him. "I was about to ask him to leave," he insists. "Isn't Hyung requesting privacy today?"

"More than the usual?" Chanyeol rises both brows as if it were a surprise to him. It isn't. "Yeah, he is." at that, Chanyeol sort of looks down at his shoes. They shine polished against the red silken carpet, the glazed chestnut rounded toe matching the roast of his hair just right. 

"Who is that?" Baekhyun blinks widely at them both, two trees neatly shading him from the light of chandelier overhead. "--Hyung I mean?" he gestures down the hall with his chin. 

Chanyeol tilts his head unsure if he should answer or not. "I don't think--"

"--this is the establishment you're looking for." Sehun cuts in. "Chanyeol go assure Hyung that there is no hang up, he can test today in peace." 

Chanyeol shakes his ruffle of bangs out of his face before turning around. He's only taken two steps when that man steps out from the room and all Baekhyun's breath is lost to him. 

He seems to float down the hall, his hair is glossy black, the silk threads of his shirt so fine they resemble soaked fabric pressed his collar, peeking out at his wrists beneath the cuffs of his blazer. 

"Is there a problem?" His voice is delicate, slips through the cracks so easily Baekhyun could mistake it for a lullaby. It's directed more at Sehun and Chanyeol judging by the way Sehun kind of slumps his shoulders in resignation, crosses his arms. Chanyeol looks back down at his feet. 

"No--" Sehun starts. 

"Would you like to speak to me?" He says, still serene. He gestures back down the hall to that room filled with smoke. 

Baekhyun swallows, bites his bottom lip and doesn't really think he can refuse even if he wanted to.

"Zhang Yixing," Yixing says ushering Baekhyun into the room first a moment later. 

Baekhyun wishes he could say he was taken aback by the luxurious gas lamps, each one shiny copper with thin twined and shaped around the base uniting to connect it to the canopy. There's only one of three lit in the center of the room, each milky bulb clouded by the surf of smoke lingering up against the ceiling. 

"Baekhyun," he says quickly in response, mouth parted, eyes still wide.

"I take it this isn't where you planned on going?" Yixing says tilting his head. He turns his back to Baekhyun to face the table. "I've never seen you before -- you're not on the client list?" 

Baekhyun clears his throat, scratches his forearm. "Funny what looks like an antique shop these days--"

Yixing's laugh is budding and halves the smoke clouding the room. "What are you looking for?" He's fiddling with something but Baekhyun can only see the thick curve of his back, the ironed black suit. 

Baekhyun locks and unlocks his fingers in his lap, "A tea canister -- Qing period 1740s--" 

Yixing perks up his head. He turns around. 

In his hand is a dainty tea pot, polished porcelain, gold filigree and blue ink figures along the curve. 

"Kangxi," he says, "close, but not quite."

Baekhyun slumps a little. He huffs and tastes wildflowers on his tongue. He accepts the tea and saucer from the matching set and sips at a London import. 

"Funny how things age," Yixing sits down next to Baekhyun, each thread of his suit presses gently into the satin plush of the cushions below him. "I'm--in contact with a few sellers in Hong Kong, maybe I could find one for you--then send you on your way--"

"Oh, you don't need to go through the trouble--" Baekhyun raises his hands, "I wandered in here, whatever here is, but I'll leave you to your business," he makes to place the saucer between them but Yixing holds out his hand instead and takes it from him. 

His voice alone is enough to stop Baekhyun right there. "If I have the means it's no trouble," Yixing's voice is serene, thoughtful. 

Baekhyun swallows, he feels a little light headed, the room smells like peonies. 

Or poppies? 

But there is something else there, slipped just beneath it, a crushed velvet press of over ripened bitter-melon. 

"You seem very," Baekhyun settles back into the seat, sinks further down into it. "Accommodating." 

"I would hope so." Yixing says smiling. "My business wouldn't be as successful if I wasn't." 

Baekhyun eyes the lacquered legs of what he assumes to be Yixing's desk, rich cherry wood and intricate iron work patterning the front. 

"I guess I've been here long enough to ask, how did I mistake an opium den for an antique shop?" Baekhyun hunches forward, turns his head and gives Yixing a meek look. "I take it you're the owner?" 

Perhaps it was the brass and brick layer work out front that reminded him of the gated villages he'd seen in sepia toned photos stuffed between the news pages of new British territories on mainland China. 

Yixing tilts his head again, eyebrows raised like he was frankly surprised he did not have to break it to him. 

"I have to say I am. We do have antiques here," Yixing says unphased, "Though, those aren't for purchase--out of your price range I'd wager," he's more blunt and matter-of-fact than he is malicious. 

Baekhyun bristles, "And what about me says I can't afford it?" 

"I've come to learn that the smell of aristocracy, isn't one of silk or pearls," Yixing looks down into his teacup, it's gone cold so quickly. "You would have recognized it immediately." 

For the first time since appearing there, Baekhyun looks at Yixing like he pities him. 

Baekhyun shrugs, "Y'know, if you didn't assume perhaps I would have taken you up on that seller offer," he narrows his eyes but there's no heat. 

Instead he feels the heat from outside the room, emanating from a fair few blown glass opium lamps, each one hidden in a room just as plush as the last. It bites at the skin of Baekhyun's nape like cold would. 

Like heat would. 

"I could direct you to an--affor--an actual antique shop if that's what you'd prefer." Yixing's voice is tart once more.

"I'll take that as a peace offering." Baekhyun puffs out his cheeks. He eyes Yixing once more, his adam's apple bobs like he's nervous but his every limb is as steady as they come. 

"I'm glad," Yixing smiles but the room doesn't feel much lighter. Baekhyun feels his own skin break out in cold. Yixing may be welcoming, may be beckoning. Tempting. But his stomach is beginning to churn and he doesn't know anyone here. The thick scent of vapor packs the rooms like dew gathering on glass. 

Baekhyun nods his head, a half bow before he stands. "I heard you were busy--so I guess I should go." 

"I'll make sure to follow up." Yixing lets him go.

Baekhyun spends the next week at the Hwaseong Ramen Bar, believes he's catching whiffs of creme poppies curling through stewed umami and overcooked soba. He's swept the floor three times in the past hour but every time he looks back over the counter, there's more cigarette butts and fried garlic crumbs on the floor beneath the benches. His restless limbs preventing him from sitting idle the way he would usually.

Baekhyun slumps back on his bench near the payment counter and counts the large hunks of pork thigh hanging on hooks near one of the prep tables still visible above the cooks' and assistant's heads. 

"Kyungsoo-yah" Baekhyun whines into the kitchen, brushes one of his hands down the folds of his apron on his thigh. He knocks his forehead into the stem of the broom and sighs deeply. "I want to go home now," 

Kyungsoo stops in his journey from the pantry to one of the counters, in his hands a stalk of green onion and taro root. "Or you work diligently until closing and then we go home." 

"But--"

"He'll contact you if that's what you're worried about." Kyungsoo says, moving again. It's almost hard to hear him over the searing of the woks and the fry of oil and the chatter of the other kitchen hands. 

Baekhyun looks up then, indignant. "That's not what I said." 

"It is." Kyungsoo insists. He passes off the ingredients to one of the chefs before heading back towards the pantry. Back towards Baekhyun. "Just be patient." Kyungsoo says expression soothing to Baekhyun even if it is a little blank in reality. "He said he'll contact you and he will." 

Baekhyun's shoulders release a tension he didn't know he had and he sighs again. "Can you make onion cakes when he get home?" 

Kyungsoo appears to take pity on him, he refolds one of his sleeves up his forearm, lips tight. "You're lucky Jongdae is off today," He says disappearing into the pantry briefly before appearing again. This time in his hands is parchment lined container of dried glass noodles in neat knots. 

Baekhyun mumbles something into the broom stem, something akin to the object being his only friend. Jongdae had laughed a full fifteen minutes after he told him he'd mistaken an antique shop for an opium den. Baekhyun turned bright red before abruptly occupying himself with a spilled bowl of broth across the room. 

"You know he just loves to tease you," Kyungsoo says, passing off the noodles too and receives a tap on the shoulder in return to take his break. 

"I know," Baekhyun frowns, he lolls his head back, stretching when Kyungsoo takes a seat beside him. 

Kyungsoo isn't one to prod him because usually Baekhyun will start speaking on his own anyway. Instead he pinches Baekhyun's cheek hard enough Baekhyun jumps, hand flying up to sooth his face. 

"Now you look like a baby too," Kyungsoo smiles then. 

Baekhyun just shuts his eyes in resignation at that point. 

The restaurant is nestled on the second floor of a herb store that looks to be on its last legs. Men only go there to smoke and whine about wives they didn't deserve. Baekhyun sweeps near the windows, they line the entire front wall, give the customers a view of the crowded streets of Hwaseong. Half the side streets are still rough with dirt, but new trade contracts with Britain account for the bustle of product between there and the ships that move in and out of the coast. Sometimes he counts ratio between traditional dress and the black suits on the street below or the curses behind him. 

Baekhyun welcomes the men in, they seat themselves and he takes their orders. Between trays of cheap soju and imported no name beer, Baekhyun spends as much time as possible behind the counter talking to the cooks and assistants instead of taking the back hand comments and aggressive advances towards him. 

One of the chimes pinned to the door sounds as it's opened. There's a stairway that leads straight up from the street. Baekhyun looks up and immediately takes a step back, he's sure Sehun caught the movement but he's expressionless when Baekhyun steps up to greet him. 

His hair appears to have furrowed into a bird's nest from the humidity outside. Sehun closes the door behind him. He sweeps the place with his eyes before settling back on Baekhyun. 

"I wasn't sure you worked here, I just thought you went here all the time." Sehun says blatantly and Baekhyun fights to keep the laugh in.

"I wouldn't say I'm the type to frequent here voluntarily." Baekhyun gives him a tired look. "--do you want to sit?" 

Sehun's mouth flaps closed as if he were going to say something but instead he nods and follows Baekhyun to a single seat near one of the windows. 

Baekhyun brings him a small portion of beef brisket and bean sprout soup with a room temperature beer. Sehun nods again in thank you, motions for Baekhyun to take the seat across from him. Baekhyun glances back into the kitchen then at the door before he takes the seat. 

Baekhyun plays with his fingers beneath the table, he's sure Sehun can see the fidgeting in his arms but he doesn't really seem to care at that point. 

Before anything else, Sehun passes a thick piece of paper across the table. Neat off-white cardstock within a rather plain envelope with a red wax seal. The seal is that of a branching ginko tree. 

"From Yixing Hyung." he says before he lifts the bowl in his hands and takes a sip of the broth. When he sets the bowl down, he looks pleased. "I don't know what it says, but I'll assume it's an update on the teapot." Sehun takes a careful sip of beer, if it wasn't for the way his mouth presses together, Baekhyun would've assumed he liked it. "I would know, it was me that traveled to Hong Kong for it." 

Baekhyun pulls it towards him. He immediately puts his hands up in surrender. "You didn't have to. I thought-- Yixing was going to show me where to get it." 

"It's too late for that." Sehun says, there's no bite even if he does look like he wants to leave. 

"So," Baekhyun leaves the envelope unopened in front of himself. "Why couldn't Yixing--"

"Hyung--"

Baekhyun clears his throat, he can't help but to smile through it. He wants to pinch Sehun's cheek the way Kyungsoo does to him. "So why isn't Yixing Hyung here instead?" he corrects. 

Sehun puffs out his cheeks and Baekhyun wonders why he doesn't get called Hyung too. 

"Baekhyun?" Sehun tests, "Hyung told me," he adds. "He was busy. So I'm here in his stead." he says shortly. 

Baekhyun nods. "Oh. And you?"

"Oh Sehun," he says. Before he can continue Baekhyun, atuned to the chime of the door immediately stands as if on instinct. Sehun shoos him away to go deal with the customer. 

Baekhyun, having slipped the envelop into the front pocket of his apron, doesn't find much time to go back and discuss anything with Sehun as business men, some in suits some in hanbok robes and pants pour in from the street below. 

He's tending to orders and cleaning tables at one moment to find Sehun sipping once more at his broth, he's looking out the window. It's a little cloudy. 

Baekhyun disappears to fetch some clean bowls from the back and when he looks back Sehun has already left. 

Afterwards, closing time goes smoothly, all the gentlemen leave and Baekhyun helps Kyungsoo open up the windows to air out the cigarette smoke. Baekhyun does dishes so long his hands look like they're shriveling up and Kyungsoo taps him on the shoulder because the chefs have already gone home and it's time for them to shut the windows and go home too. 

The streetlights light the cardstock up in a yellow as if it were years old. Baekhyun slows his steps each time they pass under one and Kyungsoo's not exactly waiting for him. 

"Baekhyun, in ten more minutes we'll be home and you can read it there." Kyungsoo shuffles his hands in and out of fists. It's cold. 

Baekhyun doesn't tell him he'd read it over for the fifth time by then. Yixing's hand writing is a bit messy, Baekhyun's misread a few of the words, but he'd gotten it in the end. 

He puts the letter down, lets it hang by his side as he reaches Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo lets him catch up this time. 

"What does it say?" Kyungsoo says, Baekhyun can feel the puffs of his breath on his cheek when he straightens Kyungsoo's scarf around his neck. 

"He found the tea pot I'd been looking for for months now." Baekhyun smiles and his eyes become crescents. "He says I should drop by when I'm free to get it." 

Kyungsoo chuckles softly, just barely. "I'm glad." 

Baekhyun spends the next two days of work in a cycle of sweeping the floors more than usual and washing wok after wok, he cuts carrot stems and separates beef bones for stock, even bothers to tease Jongdae a little for evading the shrimp cleaning. Jongdae chases Baekhyun out of the kitchen with orange tinged fingers. 

At last it's his day off, Baekhyun almost gets lost again trying to make his way back. The familiar red banner greets him as he slips right inside. 

"Oh, it's you." Sehun steps out from his familiar doorway. He sticks his hands into his pockets casually. 

Baekhyun pouts, "Not even a little excited to see me?" he acts like a bird basking beneath the gaslamp and Sehun just crosses his arms. 

"Oh, Baekhyun's here?" Chanyeol's head pops out from the doorway Sehun appeared from. 

It's the same as the first time, except it's not. Baekhyun's not nearly as high strung as the first time. Both Sehun and Chanyeol are now familiar to him at least slightly. This time, however, Baekhyun notices that while the gaslamps overhead are on, half the bulbs are not lit, the many of the doors that line the hall are closed. The scent is heavier than last time. 

"It is operating hours," One side of Sehun's mouth lifts, clearly amused, "Chanyeol Hyung has to work exclusively in Hyung's office because he's too cheery for the mood." he sounds a little smug. 

Chanyeol sends Sehun a glare that isn't one bit malicious, "Come on Baekhyun, his office is this way." 

They leave Sehun there to manage customers if need be. 

"Where's Yixing Hyung?" Baekhyun peeks around Chanyeol's arm as they walk down the hall. 

"He's not here today." Chanyeol says broadly, by the tone Yixing could be anywhere, a concept even. Baekhyun presses his lips together. 

"Do you know where?" Baekhyun shuts his mouth after that. He's more curious than anything. 

"It's not my business to say." Chanyeol says easily, he waves a dismissive hand, with the same hand he turns the brass handle of Yixing's office open. "But don't worry he'll be back," Chanyeol closes the door behind them, "--can't disturb the customers--," he grins, "--when he gets back. Sehun may be younger than all of us but he's capable." 

"I figured," Baekhyun takes his spot on Yixing's plush couch and watches Chanyeol head to one of the tall cabinets up against the wall. The panels are clear glass and Baekhyun can spy botanical guides and folds of what look like sheet music through them. The handles and hinge accents are brass too. "You don't seem like the type to work here?" Baekhyun rests his elbows on his knees. 

"Oh, so you're Sehun now too?" Chanyeol's talking into one of the cabinet sections. This one is lined with neatly stacked files and small crushed velvet boxes. It takes what appears to be Chanyeol's full range of reach to get to it pressed into the back of the cabinet. He pulls back with a satisfied expression. The box looks relatively small in his hands, it looks like an old hat box, patterned with faded green vines and baby blue baby's breath. "For the record, I was here before Sehun," he says making his way to Baekhyun. 

It sits in his lap, folded within layers of powder silk, the filigree is indeed gold and Baekhyun feels something warm and comforting settle low in his stomach, as if he were the teapot itself. He traces the curved roofs gently with his thumb, the swirl of blue ink clouds along the upper third. 

"Thank you," Baekhyun's just staring at it. "really, thank you--" he looks up then. Chanyeol is leaning up against the desk the same way Yixing was. 

Chanyeol smiles back at him, genuinely, "It's no problem, if Sehun tries to take all the credit don't listen to him, Hyung was there too." he looks all too happy to expose Sehun. 

"You-- I mean, he didn't have to--"

"Ah, he wanted to." Chanyeol says. He shifts from one foot to the other. 

"I do want to thank him in person," Baekhyun goes back to staring at it, the porcelain is smooth, but crackled beneath the paint. It's in those cracks he can see the age. "How do you even get a job like this?" Baekhyun asks looking back up at him. 

Chanyeol crosses his arms, "This is my building-- Yixing's just a well paying tenant." He chuckles low, "I'm just a part of the decor." 

"Fully furnished huh," Baekhyun says, he stifles the laugh in his throat. 

Chanyeol raises a brow, "Contrary to popular belief, I'm just as capable as a manager in Yixing Hyung's absence." he crosses his arms defensively.

"Oh, I never doubted you," Baekhyun still sounds amused, he tries to hide his hand. He can already see the smile in Chanyeol's eyes. "--What is he like? Hyung I mean," Baekhyun stares pointedly back to the pot in his hands, holds it as if it were filled with hot wuyi. 

Chanyeol perks up like he wasn't expecting the question. "He's funny." he says after a second of thought. "Really thoughtful, hardworking." He looks satisfied with his assessment. "He's the reason everything here runs as smoothly as it does. Without him, none of this would've worked out." 

"Oh," Baekhyun parts his lips, "He just seems kind of serious." 

"It's what he has to do to keep everything going." Chanyeol says idly. He twists his body, starts playing with a wooden block print on Yixing's desk. He holds the small square in his hands, Baekhyun can't see the print as a whole but he spots neat blue edges. 

Baekhyun can feel the next question rise in his throat, he starts to carefully fold the corners of silk back over the tea pot when he says, "Have you done...this before?" Baekhyun resists the urge to gesture because he's sure Chanyeol knows exactly what he's asking. 

Chanyeol's hands still. He stares pointedly at them and for a moment and Baekhyun's about to apologize when he says, "Yeah, I have." he looks up at Baekhyun then, puts the block down and raises his hands, palms up, "no one made me do it of course. It was just once. Yixing Hyung just insisted that he be there so nothing could go wrong." He starts to rub the palm of his hand with the thumb of the other. "---I can't help but be curious I guess." Chanyeol scratches at his nape. "--it scared me more than anything. Hyung never left--he stayed to keep me grounded." 

Baekhyun slides the lid back onto the box. "That doesn't sound very fun," he ventures. Chanyeol stands up off the desk and heads towards him, he takes the spot Yixing was previously. But even despite that, he feels a warmth edge across his skin, a bloom of affection for Yixing in his chest. "He's a good Hyung isn't he?" 

"Everyone reacts differently," Chanyeol assures, he tilts his head. "Yes, only for him would I allow my storefront to be the receive center for product from Changsha." He smiles fondly at that despite it all. 

Baekhyun's bouncing his leg, "I don't know-- not that I've really thought about doing it or anything, but I don't think I will." Baekhyun admits, he's running his fingers back and forth across the seam of the box. "After all, I've only been here twice." he lets out a light laugh. "it seems high end too, you don't see these around here much."

Chanyeol laughs with him, "Don't worry about it. Sehun's never taken any and he's the one that goes back and forth to China all the time to insure it gets to us here." His shoulders seem to relax then. "And it is." He laughs again. "Sehun wouldn't be here if the product was poor." 

"I'm a dishwasher," Baekhyun says blowing tired air through his lips, "Even if I wanted to, Hyung would have to give me a free sample or something and even that seems unlikely." he chuckles. 

Chanyeol hums, "You're probably right about that. Sehun would track you down if you tried to take any. I know I tease him but he takes care of everyone here while Yixing Hyung takes care of us." 

That settles the churning sitting low in his belly.

Baekhyun leaves soon after. Feeling like he's overstayed his welcome, Chanyeol profusely disagrees, even going so far as to ask if he wanted any tea or food. Baekhyun bows before he promises to return when he's sure Yixing will be there. Chanyeol suggests he come back in two or three days time then. 

Baekhyun wakes up to the sight of Kyungsoo rummaging through his wardrobe for a shirt to wear. When Kyungsoo opens the dresser, Baekhyun can spot the small patterned hat box on the top shelf next to some old pairs of shoes. The box is empty now, while Baekhyun does have the canister out in the kitchen next to the tea cups, some old ones that don't quite match but it's all they have, he doesn't quite have the heart to fill it with loose leaf yet. 

Kyungsoo pushes aside a few plain jeogori in favor of a grey button up, Baekhyun had picked that out for him when they went to a open air market a few months ago. Baekhyun watches him tuck the edges into his pants. 

"I'll probably be late coming home today," Baekhyun murmurs into his pillow, he turns over and feels the cool air hit the small of his back where his shirt has ridden up. 

"Will he be there?" Kyungsoo has wandered back to him, he's bending down to retrieve his shoes from beneath his bed. He sits down across from Baekhyun and begins to slip on his socks. The space between their beds isn't too cramped but Baekhyun is close enough he can smell the camellia oils on him, it's warm from his body heat and weaved through the scent of the steamed rice he ate that morning. 

"Yeah," Baekhyun yawns, "hopefully."

"Alright," Kyungsoo sighs, "I'll be here when you get back." He's holding his shoes in his hands ready to put them on once he's outside the room. "I'm leaving now, eat some breakfast before you leave." 

"Okay. See you later." 

Baekhyun shuts his eyes once more, but he doesn't fall asleep and maybe he does. When he shuts his eyes he sees that lean figure standing in the doorway of his office. The only version of Yixing he has is one of sleepy glamour, shining eyes and the deep black of his suit. Hair so neatly combed and eyes rich and dark. His voice so delicate behind lips plush and pink. 

Baekhyun brushes his own ruffle of hair out of his eyes and tries not to get his hopes up. He turns over again, eyes level with the window. It's cloudy again, a bit cool too. He can see the bits of condensation welling on the surface, the gathered droplets that slide down and gather at the grimy bottom sill. 

He blinks slowly and puffs out his cheeks willing conviction to well up inside his chest before turning over again and shoving his face into his pillow. 

It's Sehun that leads him this time. Sehun had greeted him quieter than previously; one of the doors in the hall is open, Baekhyun catches a glimpse of a thin white night dress in the dim of the room but that's all he can see so instead he shifts his gaze back to the door of Yixing's office. He's looking expectantly at it when Sehun suddenly takes a left past it towards a flight of paisley carpeted stairs. 

Sehun has one foot on the first step when he says, "Hyung lives upstairs you know." Sehun continues upwards with no other explanation. 

Baekhyun isn't aware of how anxious he is until they reach the top, well Sehun is standing at the top. He's giving Baekhyun a look of confusion to his spot in the middle of the flight. Where he's staring up at him, one of his hands holding tighter than necessary to the rail.

"Come on Baekhyun. I am working." With that Sehun slips a key into the lock and pushes the door gently open without knocking. 

Sehun lets Baekhyun enter before him, in fact he doesn't even step inside. Instead, he says, "You don't mind staying up here for a while do you?"

Baekhyun's stock still right in front of the threshold. "Where is Yixing Hyung? Where are you going?" He stops himself from reaching for Sehun's sleeve. 

With a minute tilt of Sehun’s head, his posture slumps just barely, "He’s there Baekhyun," Sehun says, "Just trust me. He wants to see you," he follows Baekhyun’s eyes to ensure Baekhyun is look back at him.  
Baekhyun twiddles his thumbs in front of himself, “I don’t want to bother him—“  
“You do want to thank him for the teapot right?” Sehun gives him an expectant look, eyebrow rising when Baekhyun immediately nods his head.  
“It’s a canister but—“  
Sehun waves his hand dismissively, "Details, details, Hyung," he says, "I’ll just tell him later how you find me much more interesting to talk to—"  
Baekhyun pouts, crosses his arms.  
Sehun closes his mouth briefly, opens it, “Then go, Hyung can hear us, I’m sure.” he slips the key back his pocket. "He’ll mope –he is expecting you today,"  
Baekhyun perks his head up, "He mopes?"  
"Yes, he does Hyung. More than you think," Sehun smiles fondly, "But don't tell him I told you that—he is in charge here—his reputation and all that,” he stifles a quick laugh, quick to mask it as a cough before smoothing down the front of his shirt with his hand before reaching forward to curl his fingers back around the handle, "It would be best if you stayed put for a bit, you’re like Chanyeol I can’t have you ruining the mood of the clients—I’m already drawing up new hours as it is,” Sehun says more as an aside to himself before he closes the door between them both not before giving Baekhyun a quick, “Don’t worry Hyung~”  
Baekhyun has clammy palms which he rubs together to warm them up.

Yixing's apartment is wide windows with thick plum drapes, he can spot the railing of a rusty fire escape through the window in the kitchen. Just like the den below, the outside is completely unassuming compared to the inside. Baekhyun takes in the low table and cushions which appear to be sewn rich silk, there's even an accompanying western style loveseat framing the traditional space. 

He wanders into a short hall paneled in dark wood, it reminds Baekhyun of Yixing's desk downstairs. 

Baekhyun counts the wood knots in the panels while his hand hovers over the door itself, his fist tight. 

"Yixing Hyung," Baekhyun says without knocking. "I'm not sure if you remember me or not but I wanted to thank you for the gift in person--"

The door opens a beat later, Yixing's smiling gently and his eyes are sleepy open. "I would hope so. I would hope Sehun would know better than to just send strangers up here instead of to my office." he says looking fond but worn.

Baekhyun's half mesmerized by Yixing's face. He takes in the heavy lids and the dark eyes and the way his cheeks are more full than sunken, to the pink of his lips that reminds Baekhyun of having to pickle the ginger at work. 

"You really didn't have to go through the trouble for this, I can pay you back--"

Yixing raises a hand to stop him and Baekhyun clamps his mouth shut. 

"Baekhyun, I did it because I wanted to and nothing more," Yixing says, "you are not in any way indebted to me." Yixing says expression thoughtful. With one hand he begins to fold back the long sleeve that falls over his other hand. 

Silk doesn't fold all together well, it scrunches and slips between his fingers. Yixing's shirt is crinkled, it hangs loose and luxurious on his body, there's a tendril of hair of place, looped askew against the rest. Baekhyun reaches up and straightens it, flattens it with his hand. 

Baekhyun shifts his weight back and forth between his feet and hopes he didn't just overstep his boundaries. 

Instead Yixing smiles again, there's little fond lines faint at the corner of his eyes and Baekhyun wants to trace those too. 

"When you told me about it," Yixing starts, making his way past Baekhyun and out of the hall and Baekhyun follows him not wanting to be left alone. "No matter what, it was something of meaning to you and that--" Yixing sort of stops, he tilts his head back in forth, in search of the right word or phrase while he runs his fingers across the front of an empty plant pot in the window sill of the kitchen. It's gloss is cracked and splitting. It takes Baekhyun a moment to realize there's a small budding sprout, a few actually, centered in the damp soil. When Yixing apparently finds none sufficient, he closes his mouth briefly. 

He pats at the soil gently, flattening it down with the pads of his fingers. Yixing wipes the remnants from his fingers with a kitchen cloth he has folded on the counter next to him. 

"I admire the sentimentality you have to something you've never actually seen before," Yixing says beginning to fold the sleeve of his opposite hand. 

"Oh," Baekhyun waves his hand almost dismissively, "it was just something I'd heard about from someone at work, I'd always been interested in history and something about that just seemed," Baekhyun pauses. "Attainable," he says, mouth broadening into a grin. "I wanted to see if I could do it." 

Yixing smiles then laughs, it's not the laugh Baekhyun expected but it's all the more charming. Loud and budding like the sprouts reveling in their strength to thrive.

"And you've done it," Yixing says, "will you be showing it at work?"

"Nah," Baekhyun waves his hand again, "I don't think they actually care plus they wouldn't really appreciate it. One of the chefs would probably just call it a fancy cup and try to pour beer into it," he says frowning. 

"They clearly don't deserve to see it then," Yixing agrees. "There was a seller I know in Changsha. I haven't been there in a while though, but he collected because he never found anything to be unattainable," he says looking back down at the sprout. 

Baekhyun scrunches his nose, "Wouldn't you say that's a little...presumptuous?" 

"Or purposeful?" Yixing replies. "he would roam Changsha, back and forth along the Xiang river to Yuelu mountain, he'd pray at temples and hope he'd find old artifacts. I think that qualifies as purposeful. Wouldn't you?"

Baekhyun can only stare into the affection in Yixing's eyes at the mention of Changsha. 

"Is Changsha beautiful Hyung?" Baekhyun says following Yixing out to the kitchen back door. "You seem to know a lot about it." 

Yixing presses the door of the kitchen closed behind them, they're met with the rusty railing of the grate at leads to the fire escape leading downwards. What Baekhyun doesn't expect is the left side the curls two panels around the building, the end of it meeting with the foggy glass of another door. 

The far wall of the greenhouse faces away from the apartment. The overcast of the day is visible through the panes of glass that start at the floor and curve halfway across the ceiling, half shrouded with the line of rung metal shelves and the plants crowded upon them. 

"Changsha is beautiful. I was born there," Yixing says pulling his robe a bit tighter around himself. He hides a trembling finger with a fist behind his crosses arms. His pant leg snatches, if only briefly on one of the deep troughs near their feet. The fan of leaves nearly hides it from Baekhyun's view. 

Baekhyun only remembers the odd newspaper mention here and there but he knows nothing more than the fact they were a brief secondary trade distribution location further inland before becoming sort of a landmark in their own right. 

"It's more historical than anything," Yixing says examining the bright broad leaf of a coiling pothos. Its stem coils in rivulets down from one of the upper shelves. "I don't really remember much actually," his laugh is small and bitter. "But going there for business--it's enough," Yixing settles, pressing one of the leaves back neatly into its place.

Baekhyun eyes the pots lining the top shelves, the long vine lines of the pothos curling wild and healthy down the rungs, a few reach just short of the floor. 

"Would you live there again?" Baekhyun peeks around Yixing's arm. "I mean--"

"I don't think I would," Yixing says. "It's unusual when I say that I miss it because it's almost in a peripheral manner--" Yixing admits to him. "I could tell you what my home looked like but I don't think I could tell you where it is. It's been much too long." 

Baekhyun shifts his feet once more, measures the ease in Yixing's eyes with his own. He scuffs his shoe against the planks of floor board, roughened and exposed as the carpet looks to have been stripped away. 

"I've never been anywhere else but here," Baekhyun finally says moving a bit away from Yixing to observe one of the rolling carts near the doorway. Some of the vases uptop it are archaic in and of themselves, more Qing period pieces. The cart itself looks to have been crowded to capacity with both larger vases with smaller pots squeezed into whatever open space was left. Some, sprouting with wispy orchids sit in more primitive painted broad bowls. Baekhyun pokes at a leaf with a finger, watches it shudder in response. 

Crumbs of soil litter the floor beneath the shelves. Baekhyun can see the moody overcast through the stems and foliage sprouting on each dark wood rung. "Funny how I've never thought about traveling," he says idly. 

Yixing turns to look at him, he stares thoughtfully into the profile of Baekhyun's face before he upturns to observe one of the hanging tarul plants, its leaves thick and dark, small sun shades to its own soil. 

"Boats take too long," Yixing says stepping closer, his voice pensive. "Trains are manageable," he starts to massage his palm with the thumb of his other hand, slow rhythmic circles, he could be tracing a character. 

"I've never been on any of those either for that matter," Baekhyun chuckles a bit. "Aren't you the well traveled man," he teases, smiling.

Yixing puffs out his cheeks, the pink of his lips echoing the delicate pink silk of the chaise long chair behind him. It sits with curved clawed feet up top a tasseled threaded rug against the back wall. 

"Not nearly as much as you think," Yixing assures. He begins to rub a temple gently as if in idle placation. 

Baekhyun perks his head up, "Yixing Hyung?" he tilts his head and watches Yixing squeeze his eyes shut briefly like he were blinking away bright lights that aren't on. All the gas lamps hanging above them alternating with the plants are unlit. 

"Baekhyun," Yixing blinks a few more times, he takes a measured breath. "I don't want--"

Baekhyun tugs once on the sleeve of Yixing's robe, he notices the light sheen of sweat on his throat, the way his adam's apple bobs.

"Please don't worry Hyung," Baekhyun murmurs. "I would've stopped coming before if I didn't--" he pauses, chews over possible words before he finds none sufficient enough. He moves his hand down and brushes his fingers over the back of Yixing's hand. His skin is a bit clammy. Yixing shuts his eyes again, his inhale cracks and shallows on the way in, light as if he weren't breathing in the first place. 

"I don't have to leave Hyung," Baekhyun says instead. 

For the first time Yixing reciprocates. He brings an arm up and runs a delicate hand through Baekhyun's hair, so carefully as if he were dealing with the newly sprouted leaf of a pothos. 

Baekhyun follows Yixing back into the house and into Yixing's bedroom. He toes off his shoes before he enters. Yixing opens a drawer, the handle brushed copper and rust and pulls out another velvet box like the ones Baekhyun had seen in his office. 

"Sit down Baekhyun," Yixing suggests, gesturing to the cushions uptop the thick wool rug in the middle of his bedroom. Vines crawl and weave across the span of it, in the middle a deep crimson chrysanthemum blooms unhindered. 

Baekhyun's framed by two matching, clearly imported armchairs, plush cushions and smoothly carved wooden legs. He sits down on the rug between them, feet beneath his ass and fingers scratching at the fabric covering his knee. Yixing takes the spot opposite him, his posture is relaxed, the bend in his back leisurely and graceful even in his more agitated state. 

He watches Yixing work with rapt eyes. Yixing's hands peel the box open carefully. He pulls out the clean shining bowl and the stem and the saddle almost mechanically, the way he pinches and adjusts the pieces together, methodical. 

The oil lamp, specially made for this purpose sits neatly in front of Yixing, ready for use. With eyes that focus in on the tin in Yixing's hands, from which Baekhyun watches him open to then pull out one pale green bead and place it in the pipe-bowl. 

The way his hands light the lamp and adjust the heat, thin fingers tan against the deep orange of the oil, tan against the bright brush of the wick that rises from its depths. 

Yixing cradles the bowl over the heat with half-lid eyes, as if it were monotonous he were ready for sleep. He clears his throat briefly, behind the palm of his other hand then brings it down to pull the stem closer. 

The pill softens in the bowl before it begins to bubble, begins to vaporize and the first deep inhale Yixing takes renders Baekhyun breathless himself. As if Yixing were breathing in his breath too. 

His inhales are deep and practiced, eyes gently shut, the minute tremor in his hands beginning to subside. It's not instant. It only takes Yixing about fifteen minutes before he's plucking another pill from the bag, places it in the bowl once more. 

Once more over the lamp. 

"Baekhyun," he says, eyes watching it begin to soften. "Are you still okay, I can get Sehun--"

Baekhyun shakes his head rapidly, "No, no, no, I don't mind Hyung. I still don't mind," he assures. He fidgets briefly, everything below his knees beginning to go numb, beginning to prickle uncomfortably. 

Yixing's shoulders droop. He sighs, "I'm not-- presentable," he says in resignation. "This is what it takes to assure quality for our clients and I'll continue to do so--" he cuts himself off, the bead has already begun to vaporize and he takes another deep pull. He shifts his weight onto his thigh and hip and leans the rest of it onto his bent elbow. He's half lying down now, it's the only way to keep the pipe up comfortably. 

"You don't have to be presentable all the time Hyung," Baekhyun scoots a little closer, relieves his knees of the weight and feels blood rush through them once more as he settles back down cross legged. "It's nice seeing you-- to see how much you care for all those plants you have," Baekhyun stares at his fingers. "I like that." 

Yixing hums. He eyes Baekhyun loftily, "You think so?" he takes another pull, deeper than the last. This one takes a moment to settle in his chest. He takes another deeper breath without the pipe as if it were a second swallow to keep it down somehow. 

Baekhyun stretches one leg out, his foot close enough to tap Yixing's bent weight bearing elbow. "Yeah," he replies. "Just yesterday the only version I had of you was in that fancy suit," he laughs small, fond. He brushes the silk of Yixing's sleeve with the socked sole of his foot. "Now it's just a fancy robe," Baekhyun smiles. 

"It was work hours," Yixing says in defense, as if he really were being attacked. "A suit is required for day to day operations." he rolls the pipe with its limited motion back and forth between his two fingers and his thumb, before bringing back to his mouth to inhale again. 

"I figure it was you who made that rule too," Baekhyun says without missing a beat. "Sehun wouldn't take you seriously if you came to work in that robe." 

Yixing shrugs, his brows rising as he realizes the remnants of the current pill have almost completely dissipated. He sits up then, begins to dig into the bag for another one. 

"And maybe I did." 

Baekhyun stretches out like a cat then, both feet out briefly before he sweeps them back beneath himself in favor of lying down on his belly. He's suddenly warm and comfortable, surrounded by the steady heat of the lamp and the emanation of smoke that curls around Yixing. 

He settles on his folded arm and the burning wick reflects in his eyes, as Yixing does more preparation. Yixing moves back to his previous position, when he leans back, his head almost knocks against Baekhyun's. Yixing, already perhaps, a bit strung out doesn't flinch or startle. Instead, he just moves the pipe back to his mouth and resumes inhaling. 

"He still would," Yixing says pulling the pipe away from his lips. The bud of his bottom lip is shiny with spit. He shuts his eyes again, gently, as if in sleep. Just like the lamp, the heat of Yixing is palpable, the faint smell of poppies twining with the smoke that lies faint across the surface of the floor, mingles with the neatly draped sheets of Yixing's bed. 

Baekhyun shifts his head up to look at Yixing when he opens his eyes. They're a little dark now, a little hazy, unfocused. Yixing clears his throat again, exhales smoke out of his nose as he thinks. 

"I get sleepy more than anything," he says, brows angled, throat bared and damp with sweat. His words are popping in and out of focus as if Baekhyun were feeling the effects too. "I guess... it can be considered ... more of a quiet activity," Yixing yawns. The breathy sound of his yawn arches halfway to a groan of relief. 

Baekhyun never stops watching him. Yixing begins to space out after that. He does a total of five pills before he's had his fill. He shuts his eyes deliberately for minutes at a time before they flicker open once more. His lashes flutter against his flushed cheeks, like birds navigating the smoke. His adam's apple bobs when he swallows nothing but air and he makes fists with his hands. Open and close. Open and close.

Yixing shifts restlessly, flat on his back now, the robe open around him like silk wings, his white button down wrinkled and pressed against his skin damp in spots near his collar and beneath his arms. His cock is half stiff beneath his wrinkled slacks but even then he is unconcerned. He moves onto his side, shuts his eyes tight and covers his ears with his hands.

Baekhyun stays attentive, his cheeks a bit red themselves, but he doesn't shy away. 

"Hyung," he says as Yixing's body relaxes, hands falling away and eyes fluttering open as if he's just woken up. "--does it feel good?" he asks even if he thinks Yixing can't hear him.

Yixing doesn't answer for three minutes, he stares at the burning wick while his eyes dilate back and forth minutely. 

"Does it?" Yixing murmurs, asking himself more than answering Baekhyun. He shrugs, "Does it feel good? I guess it does," he hums content with his answer. 

"Hyung," Baekhyun says again. "Do you remember what you said about Changsha earlier?" 

Yixing's head tilts forward and back like he's trying to remember. "Not really," he says after another lengthy pause.

"Well," Baekhyun presses forward anyway, maybe it's better if he doesn't remember. "I want to go to Changsha," Baekhyun says, "I don't know much about the Hunan province-- but the way you talk about it-- I want know you better, I want to know what you love--" Baekhyun's breath hitches and he stops. 

"You sound like Sehun," Yixing says counting his fingers. "--Except he was born there so... maybe not at all," he says sagely, nodding in agreement with himself. 

"The last person I'm similar with is Sehun, Hyung," Baekhyun isn't discouraged in the least. "I mean, for starters he's all business and he doesn't seem to smile much, and he's too serious plus I for one wouldn't mind trying--" Baekhyun whips his body up, suddenly aware of what he was about to say. Even with the light blanket of smoke, Baekhyun feels far too bare. 

Within a few minutes Yixing is staring at the ceiling seeming to have forgotten the thread of conversation anyway. 

"Don't worry Hyung," Baekhyun doesn't touch him. "It's okay to sleep, I'll be here when you wake up," he says gently. He looks back at Yixing whose eyes are closed. Baekhyun tries to straighten his own hair with his hands. 

He doesn't know if he convinces himself that Yixing nodded just barely, just hearing him. But within another few minutes, Yixing does fall asleep more or less. Baekhyun makes sure to lean over and blow out the lamp, dunking the room into gentle dim, he pulls one of the top sheets from Yixing's bed and drapes it over him, straightens up a messy loop of Yixing's hair once more before standing up to find his shoes. 

The next time is less soul-bearing for Baekhyun. 

It's been almost two weeks since they saw each other last. With the cool season beginning to come in the ramen bar is getting busier and busier to accommodate people looking for hot meals. He stays later washing bowl after bowl after bowl, Baekhyun thought he'd never see the day when over half their dishes stock would be in circulation at once. Jongdae stays behind with Baekhyun and Kyungsoo to help clean up, they help Baekhyun do the dishes in shifts when his fingers get too pruny and raw to feel anything and too much at once. 

"I want to go home," Jongdae whines through the stream of hot water. "I'm the Hyung, you should be listening to me Kyungsoo yah," 

"Do you want to look for another job?" Kyungsoo says looking up at him from his spot scrubbing the counter. "Be my guest, everyone's looking for work right now to avoid freezing to death. Hyung, I won't stop you if you choose to leave," 

Jongdae makes a long noise of frustration."I'm not--Baekhyunnie, I swear he wants me to leave," He turns the tap off, newly elbow deep in steaming water. 

Baekhyun laughs in spite of it all, "I'm not saying he'd be sad if you left--" Baekhyun presses on past the shout of indignation from the sink. "But he does just like pushing you," 

"And that's supposed to be comforting?" Jongdae places a scrubbed bowl into the stack of clean ones. "You spend too much time with Kyungsoo, I should have taken his shift--"

"But without it you wouldn't be able to serve that professor that comes by for breakfast--" Kyungsoo is relentless and blunt and Jongdae begins a rather loud onslaught about who told him and how he's not supposed to know that. Baekhyun sweeps that table by the window again and feels a shiver--the restaurant's done enough airing out for the night. 

Baekhyun wheedles Kyungsoo into resuming the dishes after Jongdae had done a hefty amount already. For if Baekhyun had done it both Kyungsoo and Jongdae would no doubt be goading each other into wrestling on the greasy kitchen tile, even after Kyungsoo had scrubbed it; and maybe Baekhyun is exaggerating but Jongdae does give Kyungsoo a flick to the temple and receives a whip of the towel in Kyungsoo's hand to the stomach in retaliation when they switch spots. 

Jongdae's fastening the top button of Kyungsoo's coat as they all get ready to leave, he's collecting all the dirty towels and aprons to be washed the next morning during his shift. 

"Get home safe," Jongdae always makes sure to say before they part in different directions. 

"We will, you too," Kyungsoo always says, one hand on Baekhyun's sleeve. 

The next day Baekhyun's in the middle of trying to pin point the exact shade of yellow of the man's teeth he's serving while he tries to avoid eye contact when the chime of the door opening alerts Baekhyun immediately like it always does. 

Baekhyun almost drops the pad of paper in his hands. 

Oh mustard seed. 

He slides the order over the counter on his way to the door. 

"Just one?" Baekhyun says, peering around Yixing looking for Sehun.

"Not quite," Yixing says gesturing back down the stairs, Baekhyun hears the lanky limbs, the heavy gait before he sees him. 

Chanyeol's cheeks are red with cold, his hair windswept compared to Yixing's that still looks neatly combed in contrast. They're both wearing dark coats and polished shoes. 

"So two? Or is Sehun hiding around the corner or something?" Baekhyun smiles. 

"Just two," Yixing assures. "...I was recommended the beef broth," he's saying as Baekhyun seats them. The table is a bit closer to the counter but still tolerably offset to avoid too much customer traffic. 

Chanyeol rubs his hands together, warming them up. "Hyung, I'm always open to gifts," he's saying as he scans the menu. "And by gifts I mean food gifts," His grin is toothy but charming. 

Yixing closes his menu neatly. "Just this once," Chanyeol's already beaming at him with eyes bright enough to rival the gas lamps overhead. "This is our first time here," 

Baekhyun takes their orders, and picks up empty bowls from a neighboring table on his way back to the counter. There's a small lull between lunch rush and rush hour and Baekhyun spends it sitting in the unoccupied third chair when the chefs aren't looking and tells them about how endless work has been lately. 

"You should work for Yixing Hyung," Chanyeol says offhandedly, occupied with trying to decipher the pinyin on the beer bottle label. "Except," Chanyeol adds looking over the counter at the kitchen, at the shuffling chef hands cutting mounds of onion and enoki mushroom stalks. "You'd probably end up doing office work like me though-- Hyung, why haven't we found another one like Sehun? I mean I know he enjoys being the serious one but still-- we should share the responsibility," He says in between mouthing the tones. 

Yixing actually frowns, clearly wondering why don't they have another hire. "Chanyeol, you have my permission if you really want help," he says sipping at the beef broth. "I don't mind and if you need the extra help it should be a priority." 

Chanyeol gives Baekhyun a pointed look before he's staring over the counter again. 

Baekhyun holds his hand up in surrender, "No, I'm good here honest--why have you stopped eating?" Baekhyun swats Chanyeol on the shoulder if only to get his attention. 

Chanyeol looks back at him, sticks out his tongue before he says. "I made a mistake, this is too spicy, I don't do well with spicy food Baekhyun," 

"Well, it did say 'hot oil' in the title--"

"--I thought it was a preparation description--"

Yixing sighs, "You should ask me when you read the Mandarin menu," he says switching their bowls. "I don't mind when you have questions," 

Chanyeol looks a bit bashful in response. He begins to eat the newly placed ramen in front of him after a quick thank you. 

Baekhyun reluctantly leaves to tend to customers. It's both amusing and endearing to catch little bits of Chanyeol and Yixing in passing. To see Yixing slurp at his now spicy chili ramyun and bamboo shoots, the soft boiled egg appears to give him a little reprieve from the heat. Chanyeol finishes his, formerly Yixing's, bowl with little trouble. Or the way Chanyeol's head, with his height easily clears the counter he's been looking over in pure wonder for the better part of the afternoon. Yixing taps Chanyeol's hands to get his attention, surely asking if he wants anymore food and Chanyeol's bows his head in thank you and rubs his full belly in response. 

In his periphery, Baekhyun catches Kyungsoo on his way to a short break, pulls him towards the table quickly enough Kyungsoo doesn't have time to argue before he standing in front of Chanyeol and Yixing with a dirty towel in one hand and a water soaked apron in the other, he was about to go to storage to get a new one to wear. 

"Yixing Hyung, Chanyeol," Baekhyun says, one hand on Kyungsoo's shoulder. "This is Kyungsoo, my friend. We live together." he says clapping his hands together. 

Yixing bows in greeting and Chanyeol follows, his bow a tad more casual. 

"Hello," Kyungsoo waves the hand with the towel in it. His eyes search Yixing, then Chanyeol. Chanyeol tucks his feet under his chair like he could hide his whole body if he tried hard enough. Baekhyun knows Kyungsoo can come off as intimidating but he knows otherwise. 

The door opens once more and Baekhyun is forced to leave them, not before he says quickly to Kyungsoo to "say something," and pats him on the back. 

Baekhyun's stuck between cleaning another spilled bowl of broth and cleaning up another now empty table when he looks up to find Yixing and Chanyeol getting ready to leave. Kyungsoo's doing that smile where his face scrunches up and it endears Baekhyun to him even more every time and he feels affection curling in his gut knowing they seemingly get along well. 

Chanyeol nods to Kyungsoo, cheeks still flushed and his hand wide and open for Kyungsoo to place something in. Kyungsoo tells him later Chanyeol's wallet fell out of his pants and he was just returning it to him. 

He didn't even bother to stop Baekhyun from looking like a fool when he teased him about it being their address or something. 

It's a week and a half later, on Baekhyun's day off and he's sprawled on Yixing's couch in the living room reading one of Yixing's botany volumes from his office. The one with the words he doesn't completely understand but the pictures are really nice. Yixing offers him some art history books, but Baekhyun insists he wants to learn about plants now. 

Baekhyun's comfortable there in Yixing's apartment, it's early afternoon this time and Yixing's stretching his legs from his spot on one of the floor cushions. After being bent over one of the client ledgers for most of the afternoon, Yixing fully stretched back, curling his toes and yawning in that sleepy way that denotes him as actually sleepy and not drug addled.

Yixing spends the next hour after his short break accounting for product and distribution again for clientele and the business itself when Baekhyun notices him beginning to squeeze his eyes shut, this time his fingers are beginning to tremble on the paper and his temple is aching again. 

Baekhyun sits up, folds the book closed in his lap. "Maybe it's time for a break Hyung," he says pointedly. He gives Yixing the same soft look he did the first time. "I don't mind," he says quietly. 

Yixing sort of looks at him, really looks at him and something else just slumps in his chest and he nods. His eyes going a little glassy. 

It's different the second time. Baekhyun watches Yixing pull the latches open to the velvet box to reveal the pristine equipment. His fingers have a little trouble with the clasp so he doesn't bother to with it, instead he just sets it to the side. The now empty box still stretched slightly open. 

Baekhyun sticks his fingers in his mouth idly. He feels the same feeling as last time welling in his chest. Only this time he knows what it is when he says, "Hyung. Let me try--I mean--I don't mean--"

Yixing stares at him again, paused between pulling a pill from the bag and placing it in the bowl. He hasn't lit the lamp yet either. 

"Baekhyun," he murmurs, body still. "Please think about what you just said," the bite is missing. 

"I have been," Baekhyun wraps his hands in the hem of his shirt so maybe Yixing doesn't have to see the fidgeting. "Maybe it came out a little abrupt. But this once--this is what I want--" he bites his lip, pink turns to white under the pressure. He takes a breath, deep enough it reminds him of the way Yixing does. 

"What I'm saying is that I want to understand you. Even if just a little," Baekhyun says. His voice smaller than he means it to be. Smaller than he wants. 

"You could just ask--to learn about me I mean," Yixing replies. Still so gentle. 

"I want to do that too Hyung," Baekhyun looks at him with wide warm eyes. "I really do." 

That renders Yixing silent. He spends a thick moment avoiding Baekhyun's eyes, looking at the way the light catches the glass of the bell shade on the lamp. At the way his fingers are already faltering in holding the pill between them. 

"You do?" Yixing's voice is just as small as Baekhyun's was. Hesitant. 

Baekhyun nods eagerly because going any farther terrifies him. Expressing the honest interest he has in Yixing, when it's so small and raw and still struggling to become something palpable, isn't something he's completely ready to be so forthcoming about quite yet. 

Yixing pats the spot of the carpet next to him and Baekhyun makes his way there; slowly, like an animal observing its surroundings for potentional harm. He folds his legs beneath himself once more and doesn't dare look at Yixing.

"Are you sure that's what you want?" Yixing says tempering the heat of the lamp. 

Baekhyun nods again. He takes that moment to peek into Yixing's face. Yixing's expression is a bit unreadable, his head is tilted slightly in what could be curiosity or concern. His brows drawn together. 

Yixing sighs."I understand this is your choice Baekhyun and I ultimately can't stop you. Considering what I'm doing, it would be hypocritical," He looks at his trembling fingers again and this time drops the pill into the bowl. "If you insist, if you really insist, I want to be completely sober when I supervise you--will you let me do that at least?" 

Baekhyun didn't expect the lack of fight, he didn't expect Yixing to sound just a little bit tired, like he'd said those same words before. But he nods. 

"It'll be fine Hyung," Baekhyun reaches towards Yixing and tugs on his rolled up sleeve. Yixing searches his face, his lips pressed taut. "Please trust me too," Baekhyun says slowly. 

Yixing only nods in response. He leans a bit into that small touch. 

A measured silence follows where Baekhyun watches everything slip away right in front of his eyes. Yixing sinks into the carpet dreamily once more, eyes glazed and breathing so light he might not be. His body is sweaty and warm. He slips away like the pills dropping from between his fingers. 

Baekhyun gives Yixing a hopeful look like he's searching Yixing for something he has yet find before he nuzzles up next to him this time. He digs his fingers into Yixing's shirt, grounds him. 

Grounds himself. 

Baekhyun watches Yixing experience a high he thought only sex was capable of. There's elation in his restless lofty limbs, he watches Yixing's eyes flutter open and shut, the evening sun lighting up his eyes like roasted walnuts. The way he seems to drift between wake and sleep, they both begin to blend together. The puffs of vapor blanket the floor again. Yixing's groans of relief bursting it open like gusts of wind. Baekhyun watches him until he falls asleep, and Yixing follows him there too. 

The only time Baekhyun feels grounded another week later is when Yixing has a hand pressed anywhere on him, soft on his forearm or at his nape. 

"Baekhyun," Yixing's saying in front of the lamp that afternoon, fresh off his day at work of dealing with clients. "You know if I had a choice in the matter--"

"Hyung," Baekhyun says, "It's just the once. I want to do this, let me decide." 

"I have," is all he says and begins piecing the pipe-bowl together while Baekhyun lights the lamp. He's a little tight lipped but he's still giving Baekhyun assurance.

"I'll be here the whole time alright?" Yixing says again and Baekhyun's heart is already beating hard in his chest. Yixing's heating the pill over the heat lamp now. It's beginning to soften.

"Understand, I'm intentionally preventing you from taking too many-- fortunately you don't have the same tolerance I do." He says, "And even then, just say so and one is enough and you don't even have to finish it," 

"Of course Hyung," Baekhyun's bouncing his knee now. 

Yixing takes a breath like he's placating himself before he stares at the disintegrated pill in the bowl, with one last long look at it, he passes the pipe to Baekhyun.

"Just be careful for me." Yixing says.

Baekhyun nods. His fingers brush Yixing's when he takes the pipe, they're trembling like Yixing's do when he goes through withdrawal. 

It hasn't yet been five minutes since Baekhyun's first inhale but his head is already swimming a little. Yixing had watched him bring the pipe up his mouth and maintained eye contact until Baekhyun pulled it away. 

He'd coughed but even then Yixing's expression remained difficult to read. 

It's a bit after the second pill Yixing cuts him off as he seems like he does not need much to achieve the same high it takes Yixing five for. 

Baekhyun sees the sun glittering like the ocean surface in the heat lamp and every word Yixing is saying--he's not catching much of--sounds like the chime of the stars suspended in the cosmos. Baekhyun yearns to count the stars in each word, to identify Yixing as if he were just the sole moon floating in the light of the day room. Content and so bright.

Yixing's still close to him, Baekhyun can feel the heat of him even though they're not touching. Baekhyun thinks he's talking but the look on Yixing's face makes him believe that he's speaking a different tongue. 

"This feels--" Baekhyun says shutting his eyes tight. He doesn't finish the sentence. He reaches a hand out and in the darkness of his closed eyes he can imagine closing his fingers around each star in turn each one so bright closing his eyes isn't enough.

"Baekhyun," 

The stars are smoldering.

"--focus," 

Baekhyun shakes his head and the stars are swirling now, dancing back and forth in circuits like a newly disturbed snowglobe. 

"Baekhyun," 

Yixing's voice is the flicker of the coals, in and out of focus. Bright then dark. 

The pounding of Baekhyun's heart is drowning out everything in his ears. Each beat bursts a star in his vision and he's beginning to worry where they've gone. He's afraid they've gone forever. Each star going dark until even when Baekhyun opens his eyes there's nothing to see.

Where's Yixing's voice gone?

The next morning, Yixing's mouth is pursed so tightly together Sehun wonders if he managed to get down any tea. 

Sehun's not impressed. 

He scoots closer to Yixing's desk, taps his fingers against the surface in a half beat. 

"It was a bad reaction Hyung. This is unnecessary as it is. However, if you really insist on it, you're lucky this month's profit covers this overhaul as neatly as it does. Otherwise, we'd be in a pit that would take us months to get out of--" Sehun looks down at the ledger again. "I'd still like to advise you against this. Listen to me Hyung," 

Each time Yixing doesn't reply, Sehun gets more and more petulant. 

"But Hyung," Sehun pouts, turning into the baby Yixing always saw him as. "Chanyeol Hyung had a bad reaction the first time too. It's also happened to a few clients before and they still came back---"

"Sehun--"

"Yixing Hyung--" Sehun folds and unfolds the paper in his hands, the orders. He pushes back the chair and stands before making his way around the desk to squat down in front of Yixing. To be eye level with him when he takes Yixing's hands in his. Yixing holds onto him tightly almost immediately. 

"Listen to me, this is the purest product imported straight from Hong Kong--and you know that--" Sehun pauses. With his expression furtive, he opens his mouth and with Mandarin smooth and natural as always, he says, "I trust your judgement Gege, but I also know you're not reacting the way you normally would--listen, I'll even test this shipment for you Gege--"

The look on Yixing's face is even more heartbroken than it was a second ago but Sehun remains steadfast in his approach. He digs his heels in. "I won't accept this overhaul as easily as you think Yixing Hyung. Baekhyun Hyung is fine and you know it. You wouldn't want to worry him would you?" 

Yixing's expression changes to conflict. "You already know the answer to that don't you?" 

Sehun frowns. "No, not really, you'll have to tell me Hyung," he's smiling.

Yixing sips at his tea for the first time, it's lukewarm as if the oolong leaves had been dried beneath a waning sun. He's silent for a moment. "You know, dangling that over my head isn't going to win you every argument," he says at last. 

"Oh?" Sehun finally stands. Yixing's hands now alone in his lap. He gives Yixing a sly look, "Precedent says otherwise." 

"Aren't I in charge? The boss? Don't I get final say in this?" Yixing actually pouts and Sehun pushes his tea closer hoping he'll drink more. 

"Why of course. You are the owner," Sehun says. 

"And?"

"And you've told me more or less not to get on the next ship to China and disappoint everyone that works tirelessly for your premium product here." Sehun bothers to look a little smug, "They can't have clients directing their mode of operations Hyung. That's not how it works." 

"I assure you. They work for themselves Sehun," Yixing says.

Sehun frowns. "I know that. So you're canceling that order?" he gives Yixing an expectant look. 

"If I must," Yixing sighs. He stands up and makes sure to pinch Sehun's cheek on the way to the cabinet.

"He might be awake by now you know," Sehun says rubbing his cheek with gentle fingers. 

"Kyungsoo is watching him for now. Give them time." Yixing says opening one side of the cabinet for some files. "Besides, this is still work you know. I can't be irresponsible." 

"Alright," Sehun crosses his arms, wholly unconvinced. "But you're okay now aren't you Gege?" he gives Yixing a wide eyed look. He sounds soft. 

"Sehun," Yixing retrieves the papers he'd been looking for. He places them neatly onto the desk before he shifts his arm up to brush his hands through Sehun's hair despite the height difference. "I'm merely contemplative young one." Yixing smiles. A small dimple pinches his left cheek. "Go, some clients are scheduled to show up in a few minutes." 

Sehun purses his lips, but he goes. 

The blankets Baekhyun has managed to wrap himself in are warm, silky compared to the almost scratchy sheets back home--

He rubs crust from his eyes and sits up. His head is aching and his surroundings are familiar at least. The room is lit up in late morning sun.

He'd never left Yixing's?

Baekhyun blinks sleepily a few more times and pats the spot on the bed next to him. Cold. Yixing probably slept in the living room last night anyway. 

He tries to straighten his hair with his hands. Baekhyun smooths down his shirt that's starting to smell a little ripe from being worn so long and pants that are far beyond wrinkled. He stands on wobbly legs, quick to find his footing within moments before heading out towards the living room. 

Baekhyun's surprised to see Kyungsoo sitting on one of the cushions. In his hands is the botany volume Baekhyun had been struggling to read. But his eyes are going back and forth easily in comprehension. He's by himself and keeping to himself, simply existing in his little square of cushion and nothing more. 

"Kyungsoo?" he pads closer, swallows spit to coat his dry throat. 

Kyungsoo puts the book down, now forgotten next to him.

"Baekhyun," He says standing to meet Baekhyun in the middle. "Did you sleep well?"

"Why are you here?" Baekhyun asks, eyes still narrowed in sleep if not in a bit of skepticism. 

Kyungsoo's lips upturn a bit, clearly amused. "Do you care to tell me why I had Chanyeol knocking at our door at eight this morning? I've been here three hours already. Apparently both Sehun and Yixing were too busy managing downstairs to--"

"Kyungsoo--" 

"Chanyeol's telling me that you didn't handle it well, and I have an inkling of what it is." Kyungsoo puts both his hands on Baekhyun's face, turns it back and forth as he pleases. "He said you were fine though," Kyungsoo brushes his thumb soothingly against the rise of Baekhyun's cheek bone. His own eyes are wide as he searches Baekhyun's. Seemingly pleased with his assessment, he pulls his hand away. 

"Do I look bad or something?" Baekhyun pokes at his face in an almost panicked manner like he's expecting to find something that wasn't there before. When he too comes back empty he relaxes. 

Kyungsoo's laugh is light and brief. "Just a little shitty, but don't worry about it."

"Did happened?" Baekhyun asks tentatively. "Something bad?" Seeing the concern tracing Baekhyun's eyes gives Kyungsoo pause. 

"Chanyeol told me that from his own experience that a bad reaction is something normal," 

"Oh," Baekhyun stares down at his feet and hopes Kyungsoo cannot see the tremble in his bottom lip.

Before Kyungsoo can open his mouth to continue Baekhyun cuts in.

"Aren't you hungry?" Baekhyun says, pleads with his eyes for Kyungsoo to just drop it for now. "You've usually had breakfast by now. You should eat something." 

Kyungsoo gives Baekhyun an expectant look before he goes along with him. "You should drink some water." 

Baekhyun's still rubbing the sleep from his eyes, hoping that maybe some of the red rims will fade a bit and the puffiness will go down.

"Chanyeol told me we're free to use the kitchen," Kyungsoo's already inspecting the icebox and counters. The cabinets stocked with dried tapioca pearls and glutinous rice among others. 

"He did offer to bring us food but I declined--" Kyungsoo says pleasantly while he looks at some potatoes in a small basket with some taro root. 

Baekhyun's stomach rumbles. "Why did you do that?" 

"Because this kitchen is fully stocked," Kyungsoo says standing up from where he was searching through one of the lower cabinets. He places a small but deep tub of rice on to the counter. "Steamed rice and maybe some salted fish?" he suggests. "There's always ramyun," 

He's only half joking.

Kyungsoo manages to located the base ingredients for ramyun with ease despite having never been in Yixing's kitchen before. 

"Baekhyun, chop the chicken for me please--" Kyungsoo says while he searches through the cabinets for ginger root thirty minutes later. 

"Chopping the chicken," Baekhyun repeats a little blandly. He runs the knife back and forth, the way he's seen everyone do it at the ramen bar. 

"It's okay to be scared Baekhyun," Kyungsoo says into the broad space of the kitchen. Baekhyun begins to slice the meat into even smaller pieces to avoid Kyungsoo. 

"I'm fine," Baekhyun puffs out his lower lip, as stern as a pout can be. 

"Any one would be rattled in your situation Baekhyun. Especially having to watch you go through--" Kyungsoo shakes his head and sweeps the chicken bones into the pot of water on the stove to make stock along with some already otherwise unusable carrots and stalks of celery he'd found in one of the crates near the icebox filled with two day old vegetables. 

Baekhyun lets his shoulders droop. "It was a mistake and I scared him. I--"

"This is about you first and foremost Baekhyun," Kyungsoo says. "This is about whether or not you're okay. How are you doing?" 

Baekhyun squeezes his eyes shut too tight and tries to will away the faint stars plastered to his eyelids in the darkness. He places the knife down and pinches the bridge of his nose. "I don't know--I don't even really know what happened other than taking the first inhale and seeing Yixing Hyung's face then I woke up this morning." Baekhyun exhales sharply through his nose. 

Kyungsoo tilts his head to one side. "Your decisions are your business at the end of the day and sometimes the consequences are unforeseen," Kyungsoo says. "It's nothing to be ashamed about." 

"Alright--"

"Baekhyun," Kyungsoo's voice is firm. "Just know that you don't have to worry alone," 

Baekhyun doesn't reply.

They cook in silence for a while. Kyungsoo rinses noodles in the sink while Baekhyun roasts garlic on a small briquette near the open back door. If he breathes deep, he can smell the slip of gentle orchid beneath the rich smolder of garlic filling the kitchen. Baekhyun's putting the grate away thirty minutes later while Kyungsoo chops some green onion. 

"Ginger root, Baekhyun?" Kyungsoo says once Baekhyun makes his way back into the kitchen proper. 

Baekhyun's grating the skin off with the tip of a soup spoon when he sort of deflates. He presses his cheek into the surface of the table where the smell of ginger is most pungent and lets out a miserable sounding whine for Kyungsoo. 

Kyungsoo sighs deeply and wipes away the prickle of an onion tear at the corner of his eye with his hand. 

"What is it Baekhyun,"

"I like him Kyungsoo," Baekhyun murmurs into the striations of yellow, into the loose pile of peels. "I haven't told him," he says. "I wanted to understand him. Not worry him." 

"Don't cry into the food, watching the salt content is important," Kyungsoo says settling down next to him at the counter. He's wearing one of his aprons from home, pale blue with simple stitches and Baekhyun wonders if this was Kyungsoo's plan since he got here. He pinches Baekhyun's exposed cheek with his fingers. "You can talk to him after work. From what I can see you probably share similar grievances," Kyungsoo sounds pleased. 

"You're not supposed to find joy in my pain Kyungsoo," Baekhyun pouts into the vegetables. 

"I assure you I don't," Kyungsoo's about to start pulling on the cheek when there's two knocks at the door and Chanyeol comes bounding in a moment later.

In his hands is a cloth bag that smells strongly of seasoned meat. He takes one look at the set up in the kitchen before him and the bag falls limply at his side. "But I bought beef skewers. I know the really good vendors--" 

Kyungsoo's expression is already one of resignation. As if he'd noticed immediately that there were now two puppies in the house to look after. 

"You can eat it with steamed rice. I made some," Kyungsoo says standing to retrieve the bag from him. 

Baekhyun finds a welcome reprieve in just watching the way Chanyeol navigates the space around Kyungsoo. He's perceptive of the hand that's about to swat him away and yet he still pushes. Chanyeol's still in his suit, his grin broad and welcoming and genuine. He tastes the broth and compliments the balance between the fish sauce and the chicken stock. Baekhyun can practically see the tail wagging back and forth. 

"Baekhyun," Chanyeol says while one of his hands idly tugs at the tie of the apron in the small of Kyungsoo's back, not enough to pull it loose but enough Kyungsoo's noticing that he's doing it and he's about to yield the spoon should it continue. "Yixing Hyung is moping. He doesn't look like it but Sehun can barely handle him with that dimple out as it is," 

"Does he want to see me?" Baekhyun asks. Suddenly alert, he sits up off the counter and brushes a ginger peel off his cheek. 

"While I do find it entertaining that Sehun is finally presented with a situation he can't completely handle, it sucks to see boss like this if I'm being honest," Chanyeol says leaning against the counter. "He's free after hours today if you want to see him." 

After that, Kyungsoo's adding noodles to each bowl then topping them off with broth before he's placing soft potatoes, stewed cabbage and roasted garlic on top in neat sections. 

Chanyeol finishes a bowl and a plate of skewers and rice before he's smiling in content. 

He's thanking the heavens and Kyungsoo profusely for the meal while Kyungsoo accepts them as gracefully as he can. Baekhyun's stomach is too uneasy to finish more than half of it. 

"He should be in his office," Chanyeol says so abruptly, Baekhyun jumps and almost knocks his chopsticks off the table. 

Baekhyun makes a noise akin to a squeak. 

"Don't worry," Chanyeol says, his fingers twining around Kyungsoo's apron string again to keep them busy. "He's expecting you." 

Baekhyun fidgets in his seat. He's back in Yixing's office just like that first time so long ago. But this time he's sitting in the chair opposite Yixing, not on the loveseat near the door.

His chest tightens because Yixing's usual warmth is separated from him by the desk between them. It aches knowing there's no immediate skin to touch. He could get high on that alone. Instead, he pushes one foot forward beneath the desk, touches the toe of his shoe against Yixing's.

Yixing doesn't pull away. 

He takes a slow sip of his tea, it smells bitter and Baekhyun just knows there's no sugar in it. 

"No one is to blame," Yixing begins abruptly. Baekhyun just counts the lines in the wood. Traces them with his eyes. "I think we can agree on that part at least-- I want to apologize Baekhyun. I want to say that had I known you would react that way--maybe it was too much at once, maybe it was just that first time, it happens, maybe I did something wrong--"

"--Hyung," Baekhyun cuts in then. "Didn't you just say that no one was to blame?" He chuckles lightly. "I mean, I don't even remember what happened exactly Hyung," Baekhyun admits. "So it's fine."

Yixing smooths a hand down his face, tries to rub some of the exhaustion away. 

"It was going well Baekhyun," Yixing smiles in spite of it. "Then you started panicking. I asked you to focus on my voice to stop you from thrashing," he's recalling it like he'd rehearsed it prior. Yixing's voice is calm but firm. 

Baekhyun can hear the faint stars again, faint in the dark of his lids when he closes his eyes. They twinkle like lights hidden behind frosted glass. 

"I got you to calm down and you fell asleep shortly after. I deliberately gave you a smaller dosage so it wouldn't last long. But you reacted badly and apologize for agreeing in the first place. If I had known--"

"That's the thing Yixing Hyung. It happens and I don't want you to take the blame for something that wasn't your fault," Baekhyun says carefully. "Besides I'm okay," he assures. He sees the way Yixing's eyes gain that faint glimmer. "Maybe it's good that I don't remember it. If it was as bad as you say. I'm glad I don't," 

"Don't say that for my benefit. You come first." Yixing says immediately. 

Baekhyun places one hand on the desk, pushes it forward until the tip of his finger touches the saucer his own teacup sits in. Shiny speckled porcelain. 

"As do you," he says easily. There's a pang in his chest but he ignores it.

Yixing reaches forward until the tip of his ring finger grazes Baekhyun's. 

"I wouldn't blame you if you lost what little trust you had in me Baekhyun," Yixing bows his head, just erring on the side of too deep, too respectful. The way he probably would to a client probably. 

"I'm not a client Hyung," Baekhyun says shortly. In fact he's a little bit alarmed by the implication. "I would hope this wasn't some elaborate scheme of getting me to invest," he teases. 

"By all means, no," Yixing says shaking his head. "I want--you're pleasant to be around," he says instead, staring into his teacup to avoid Baekhyun's eyes. 

"I trust you Hyung. I still do so don't argue." Baekhyun mimics his firm tone. "This is something we can come back from I hope." he tries to catch Yixing's gaze with his own this time. 

"That's what I'd hope is best," Yixing says. He doesn't quite know what to do with his hands after he pulls them off the table so he settles with folding them in his lap.

"At the basis of it, it was a bad experience and that's all it was,"

"We're you scared at all?" Yixing asks earnestly. "The last thing--"

Baekhyun can feel the remnants of what he could define as fear stirring faintly in his chest and in his temples. 

"I guess I was," Baekhyun admits. He shuts his eyes briefly to focus on not displaying any incriminating emotion. He stays carefully neutral. "But I don't remember much as I said. I'm going off of instinct. But you were there so not really." 

Yixing allows a little bit of pride to shade in his eyes. "That's good. I'm glad I was of use in some way." 

"You're more than that Hyung," Baekhyun says, "Don't think so low of yourself." 

...

"Hyung," Baekhyun starts out carefully. "I know you won't like this but--" he pauses to watch Yixing water one of the bundles of tarul nestled between two bunches of chrysanthemums, both pale yellow bright against the deep greens of the broad leaves. 

"But what?" Yixing says patting some soil down in one of the root troughs at the foot of the high shelves. 

"I want to try again Hyung," Baekhyun lets out in a rush.

"Do you really want my answer to that?" Yixing says still patting at soil, rearranging some of the smaller decorative pebbles beneath the stems. 

"Not really since I know what it is," Baekhyun smiles in that sweet way that usually gets him what he wants but Yixing has yet to budge after Baekhyun had brought it up just two days after their discussion in his office. And then again over breakfast two days later and then today just a week after that. 

"It's not that I don't trust you or the product for that matter it's not important, what's important is that you're safe," Yixing punctuates it with the trickle of water into the soil from the can in his hand. 

"I know that," Baekhyun says from his spot on the lounge chair. He runs his hand pleasantly back and forth across the soft material. "And the thing is I do feel safe, because you're there with me making sure nothing goes wrong," Yixing still has his back to him from his spot near the troughs. He's squatting and the hem of his robe brushes the floor. 

"That's quite the responsibility you've given me, do you know that?" Yixing finally turns around then and crosses his arms. His robe is blue this time, fabric just as expensive, glossy in the daybreak sunlight, folded cleanly at the sleeves over his white button up. 

"I was okay last time and I'll be okay this time too Hyung," Baekhyun says. "I promise I'll behave," his tone deepens just briefly. "This could be step in moving on y'know?" he stretches his legs out and fans his feet back and forth. "We can put that bad experience behind us, if only for closure." 

Yixing sighs, "For closure." he repeats, clearly unconvinced. "And may I ask how you know I haven't already found my closure?" he raises an eyebrow.

"Because, in this case, it's tied to me." Baekhyun says looking down at his fingers. "I know you don't want to hear it, but thinking about what happened last time--I think about it a lot and I think--I know this time will better. It'll put me at ease." 

For the first time in Baekhyun's persuasion plan, Yixing expression is a bit melancholy. 

"Will it?" Yixing says quietly. "Will it really help you?" 

"Yes. Hopefully." Baekhyun replies, "I'll ask again just this once, let me decide."

"You can." Yixing says. "What is it you want?"

Baekhyun settles the restlessness in his hands, wills them to still. "I want you to do it with me this time."

"Your one request?" Yixing tries to hide the shock in his voice by turning around again. Maybe it'll be easier to speak like this. 

"Yes." Baekhyun says. "This is what I want." 

This time feels different, after a lunch of seared pork and pickled cabbage and steamed rice, Yixing cleans up with the help of Baekhyun who stores leftovers and puts away remnant ingredients. 

"I don't want to scare you Hyung," Baekhyun says, settling down in his usual spot next to Yixing on the carpet in his bedroom. "I just want to stop thinking about it." 

Yixing's hands stall in opening the velvet box. "You've really thought about this haven't you? Much more than last time I'm sure." 

"Yes," Baekhyun says. "Last time, maybe I wasn't thinking--I was eager for it. I wanted-- I wanted--" he stops. 

"Baekhyun?" 

Baekhyun inhales deeply but quietly, once again to calm his nerves, the gentle thrumming already beneath his skin at the prospect of feeling that initial high once more. 

Baekhyun doesn't reply. Instead he watches the way Yixing's forearm flexes when he adjusts each fastener between the pipe and the bowl. The way his bottom lip glistens with his own spit as he licks them, focuses on digging out a few pills for the both of them. 

"Hyung," Baekhyun murmurs, his cheek smushed against the side of Yixing's arm. "I want you to know I like you," he says quietly. It tumbles out before he's even aware he's said it. 

Yixing doesn't reply and Baekhyun swears he can feel the burning of the smoke in his chest, as if his esophagus were beginning to constrict and maybe he should start looking for his shoes again. 

Yixing holds the pipe up to Baekhyun's mouth, his own curved gently, pink and full. 

He pecks Baekhyun on the temple with those lips and Baekhyun takes the deepest inhale he's ever done. He curls a hand around Yixing's arm before he passes it back for Yixing to take his turn.

With each pass, things are starting to blur and Baekhyun can suddenly see the wide expanse of the sky again. It's inky black and this time Yixing's breaths alone light up the stars, each inhale makes one brighter, each exhale makes it sharper and Baekhyun could get lost in the abyss of space happily. 

He gets lost in Yixing's mouth instead. Baekhyun can taste the heady scent of smoke between them, the tinge of grasses and poppies, the plane of Yixing's stomach is the plain of wildflowers and Baekhyun's plucking each one with his mouth. 

The sounds Yixing makes -- Baekhyun can see the way the air moves around them. The way the smoke curls through the groans, the weaves of air through the gasps of relief like a knit of sound. Each sharp breath from Yixing is the needle so finely threading through Baekhyun's heaving whines. 

Yixing's skin feels like it's almost too hot as if Baekhyun were pressed against the lamp he'd almost knocked over with his foot. 

Baekhyun's fingers feel sluggish and cold, he presses them against the hot skin of Yixing's thighs and feels the icy burn thrum up his arms, singe a trail down his spine. 

He's barely coordinated enough to pull his own pants down. Yixing's fingers reaching forward to address the hang up of the clasped button. Baekhyun's own skin meets the heated air and he melts, back to Yixing, back to Yixing's lips, mouths swallowing each other's low groans. 

Yixing's mouthing wet kisses lazily up Baekhyun's jaw line, the line of Baekhyun's cock rutting flush with Yixing's until both their thighs burn, until they're both the wick, burning and burning until they both burst into smoke. 

Baekhyun's held in place by the cradle of Yixing's thighs, he's still fully clothed, shifting back and forth against Baekhyun like he'll die if he stops. 

Baekhyun's muffling whimpers slide hot through the air into Yixing's shoulder, evaporates the sweat between them. 

The stars are beginning to blind him, Baekhyun squeezes his eyes shut and focuses on Yixing's cries of his name and the way they blur like messy strokes of paint gathering on the sweat sheen of his throat, the bobbing of his adam's apple. 

"Yixing," Baekhyun's growing restless and his thighs are beginning to ache. He rolls his hips in frantic circles, digs his hands into the skin of Yixing's side just beneath his ribcage where his shirt is pushed haphazardly out of the way. 

Baekhyun finds his movements faltering, speeding to a rigid stop and he's not even sure of he's come or not and he doesn't really care either. Yixing's already relaxed beneath him, pressing his fingers into the damp of Baekhyun's shirt. It never stops feeling good and Baekhyun doesn't even know he's crying until Yixing's wiping them away with his thumb, brushing them down his cheek and away. Baekhyun nestles his face against Yixing throat and falls asleep. 

The gentle murmur of Baekhyun's name turns each star off with gentle intent like a mother blowing out the candles after saying goodnight. Baekhyun only breathes in Yixing now and feels the same elation the opium gave him if not better. 

Baekhyun wakes up the next morning with a gentle throb in his temple. He massages it away the best he can with his eyes still shut. He's in Yixing's bed again wrapped in his blankets again too. 

He opens his eyes to find that Yixing's beside him this time, strung out and stretched out beneath the thin cotton, and deeply asleep. 

Baekhyun traces the line of Yixing's throat with his eyes, the curves of his arms, the warmth of him trapped beneath the blanket. He'd taken off his shirt completely at some point. 

Baekhyun stands, finds himself still fully clothed and proceeds to shed his grimy feeling clothes right onto Yixing's floor. One of the dresser drawers yields one of Yixing's robes, this one deep red and silk threaded. The sleeves fall over his hands, the hem draping gracefully past his knees. He ties the sides together anyway with the sash and figures he'd let Yixing sleep. 

He blames the remnants of the vapor still swimming dreamily under his skin for the sudden enveloping comfort that lives in each thread of Yixing's robe, loose around him and floating with every movement. 

One look at the floor tells Baekhyun, that at some point Yixing put away the equipment. He wonders where Yixing finds the time to be that efficient. How does he just fall asleep like a log yet Yixing takes twice as much and manages to stay lucid? Baekhyun shakes his head at the injustice. He closes Yixing's door quietly behind him, slips on a pair of Yixing's house slippers and heads out past the kitchen to the green house. 

It's cool in the early morning with no other body heat to warm him. The sun looks only to have risen an hour or two ago, but there's overcast already making its way closer. Baekhyun tries to shake the shiver away from his prickling skin. He pulls the thin fabric tighter around his body and wonders why he took off every layer that could have proved useful right then. 

Baekhyun takes his time discovering everything he hadn't been able to observe as much as he'd wanted to. He trails the perimeter, starting near the door and pads across the rug beneath the lounge chair. It's a deep plum, with delicate looking tassels. The floor beneath the chair is relatively clean, there's some more botany text books and these ones look more worn compared to the volumes inside. Some gardening supplies in cloth bags and some empty unused pots, a few cracked ones too. 

Baekhyun can see his breath when he exhales, as if he were expelling the remnants of vapor. 

There's another stack of books near the front leg of the chair, high enough to reach the armrest. The stack is wide enough it covers what looks to be a young ginko sapling behind it. Baekhyun only has the basic wherewithal to recognize the calligraphic nature of the Mandarin characters on the front and the spines of the rest. At the foot of the stack is a small watering can, cheap and tin. Baekhyun picks it up and by the weight he can tell it's still about half full. 

Almost hidden between the coils of pothos and the brimmed leaves of tarul plants, Baekhyun moves them aside to find a smaller pot, a tad taller and deeper, this one's porcelain with a wide black dyed rim. It's speckled with the same dye, and sprouting straight from them are the vivid shrouds of red petals. Tall and curved to accommodate the shelf, Baekhyun sees the way they bend and sets to find a better spot for them on a higher more open shelf. He pulls it free with both hands, the pot cradled in both while he scans the shelves for any openings near the top. 

One of the sides of the robe slips free from his shoulder, it folds delicately across a shoulder blade. He should've expected it from how big it was. But even though his shoulder is bare to the cool air, it's then he spots an opening near the top next to a pearly orchid. 

Baekhyun's quickly realizing he needs a handful of centimeters more to accomplish his task. But he's quickly sidetracked by the gentle press of lips to his shoulder. He doesn't feel cold anymore. 

Yixing slips the pot from Baekhyun's hands and places it in its new location with an ease that makes Baekhyun frustrated. 

"Why do you hide those ones?" Baekhyun says, "They're the only ones I see here and they were hidden. They're beautiful." Yixing's planting kisses up the curve of his nape now. 

Yixing pulls away. "I water them and they grow and that's it. I don't mean to hide them intentionally," he slides his hands on either side of Baekhyun's body. The press of his hands is delightfully warm and Baekhyun leans back into the touch. 

"I like you too Baekhyun," Yixing says before he mouths hot right behind Baekhyun's ear. "Maybe even love you." 

Baekhyun's skin flushes, "I'm glad you didn't forget that," he rests his fingers over Yixing's. 

"I want to remember it this time," Yixing says softly. He gives Baekhyun a beneath his ear, the edge of his jaw then. 

Baekhyun curves his head to give Yixing space against his skin. "I only have bits and pieces," he admits. He omits the part where he mentions the one constant was Yixing himself. 

"I do too," Yixing says, "Maybe just a little more even," he smiles against Baekhyun's skin and Baekhyun's already turning around to cup his face and kiss him properly. 

They kiss slow and deep and Baekhyun learns that Yixing's lips are tender and soft and deliberate always. 

Yixing's mostly silent this time when he pulls Baekhyun with him back to the lounge chair and lays him down against the plush of the pink silk cushions and kisses every bit of skin he sees, he rediscovers bruises and nips trailing Baekhyun's collar. 

Baekhyun's hands are gentle and small and soft when he parts Yixing's matching robe. He half remembers the bites that litter Yixing's lower belly and the dip of his hips. 

"You're wearing too much this time too," Baekhyun says pushing what he can aside until Yixing gets up and with little preamble and allows the robe and his underwear to pool unceremoniously onto the rug. 

Baekhyun makes an impatient noise, one that sends Yixing right back to him to they can kiss again and Yixing can nuzzle his nose against Baekhyun's cheek. 

Baekhyun looks up at Yixing in wonder, his head as clear as ever, eyes wide and bright enough to create their own stars. Yixing's skin is cool now, glistening where he's flushed. 

Yixing cock is thick and heavy, weighted full before Baekhyun's even curled a hand around it. The pink of the head shines glossy each time it peeks up past the circle of Baekhyun's fingers. 

Baekhyun remembers these noises, Yixing's moans breaking in the air between them, already so desperate. He lets go and Yixing's eyes snap so sleepily open again. 

He gives Baekhyun a questioning look. 

"Baekhyun,"

"What is it?" he's brushing his finger through Yixing's fringe, slightly damp against his skin already. 

"I was thinking about your one request and I think I've thought of my own too." 

Baekhyun hums in response, Yixing's hand cradling the side of his face. The soft vibration of sound thrums through Yixing's palm. "Tell me." 

"Watching you that first time, it did scare me." Yixing admits. "I thought about it a lot after that too. I thought about a lot of things. I thought about how selfish I was for agreeing to let you do it because you wanted to understand me. I wanted that too." 

"You're not selfish," Baekhyun murmurs. 

"Seeing you react the way you did, the way I do when I haven't taken it on time. It was the last feeling I'd ever want you to feel." Yixing kisses his lips, a simple tender press that leaves Baekhyun wanting every piece of him. 

"If I loved you half as much as I do now then, I would have stopped you before you even asked me." The kiss is deeper this time, Yixing slides his tongue in, warm and hot. "Then let me be selfish now too." 

"You can be," Baekhyun kisses back deep. Slow. "You can, you can." he repeats. 

"Please don't ask me again for it. I don't want you to feel what I'm feeling." 

"I won't." Baekhyun settles down once more. "Didn't I tell you? I don't think about what happened anymore. I got the closure I wanted. I got you Yixing." Baekhyun holds Yixing's face in his hands, holds him close and kisses the spot between his brows. 

"I'm glad I could be of use again." Yixing says playfully, he surges forward to nip at Baekhyun's earlobe. 

"Can I ask you for something too?" Baekhyun says and Yixing nods. "You don't have to quality check anymore Hyung. You know it's the best quality in coastal South Korea." 

Yixing tilts his head as if he'd never considered it. "You want me to quit?" 

Baekhyun nods eagerly. "Yes. My real one request." 

Yixing searches his eyes as if he'd found a new world in them. His very own.

"I want to try," he says. "I will." 

Baekhyun slides one hand to Yixing's collarbone. He holds Yixing's gaze while he slides the other hand down between them, right between his thighs to press at his own opening. Yixing kisses the angle of his brows drawn together and the reddish pout of his lips before he reaches one hand over the side to retrieve the oil he'd brought with him in a small cloth drawstring. 

Baekhyun accepts it happily and lets Yixing pull him into his lap so he can hold his hips still. Yixing kisses down his chest as Baekhyun stretches himself open. He curls his hand around Baekhyun's cock just to hear him moan at the onslaught. He murmurs against Baekhyun's throat how delicate the pink of his cock is, how gorgeous his thighs are and the curves of his hips. 

Heat from the rising sun and their bodies lies trapped in the maw of humidity inside the greenhouse. 

Yixing mouths at his damp sticky skin, slips a hand around Baekhyun's hip and slides three oil coated fingers right inside Baekhyun the moment he pulls out his own. He's already starting to shift his hips back and forth, slow rolls forward into Yixing's hand and back onto Yixing's fingers. 

Baekhyun leans most of his weight onto Yixing's shoulders, kisses his eyelids, his forehead, the plaster of wet hair on his scalp, his nose, his lips. 

Yixing's voice is so clear now, no longer underwater, or so high up Baekhyun couldn't possibly reach it. But right there, with him, within him, becoming his own. 

Baekhyun takes all of him in one slow stroke that renders them both speechless and breathless, even with the shift of his hips he's still tugging on Yixing's lips with his teeth and digging his fingers into Yixing's skin. 

He rests his forehead against Yixing's collar, nips and licks like he remembers doing. 

Yixing holds onto him tight and presses their bodies together. If Yixing was any more smitten he would assume that they were the ones fogging up all those glass panes, not the rise of heat meeting the cool open air on the other side. And yet maybe so. 

The moment Yixing begins to raise his hips to meet each down motion of Baekhyun's body has Baekhyun moaning sharply then laughing into Yixing's mouth. Baekhyun holds him like he never wants to let go and Yixing doesn't mind one bit. 

It takes Yixing thrusting relentlessly for only a brief interlude for Baekhyun to immediately shudder before spilling so beautifully over Yixing's fingers, pearly slivers of orchid dribbling across his knuckles and into their laps. 

Baekhyun slows his hips, angles enough to rock back for him, grinding down each time until Yixing holds him still to press up into him until his thighs burn and he comes mouthing at the spot beneath Baekhyun's jaw. 

He watches Baekhyun's expression. His cheeks so faintly pink, faded down his chest, lips redder and cock still aching but spent. Yixing brushes a piece of Baekhyun's damp hair behind his ear and out of his eyes. 

He wants to remember this, the way Yixing looks like he's both exhausted but elated, the way his eyes are so warm and his hands so steady. 

...

Baekhyun's fresh off his shift, a customer had vomited after one too many beers and Baekhyun was ready to leave the moment he was assigned to clean it up. Kyungsoo may have laughed at him a little prior to finally helping him a moment later. 

He been here every day for past month, Kyungsoo's teasing him about kicking him out for another better roommate and Baekhyun always gives him the silent treatment for a good five minutes every time he mentions it. Being Kyungsoo, he's learned to weaponize it to his benefit. 

It's Sehun that opens the door. He looks unimpressed at Baekhyun's presence like always. Except instead of Chanyeol's head popping out from that familiar doorway to greet him, it's someone entirely new.

"This is Kim Jongin," Sehun says. "He's here to fill in for me when I go on business trips," 

Jongin waves. His smile is infectious and Baekhyun has the feeling he might be just as young as Sehun is. He also gets the feeling from that smile that Chanyeol's probably going to have an office companion not before long. 

Baekhyun greets him, introduces himself before he heads to Yixing's office, box tucked beneath his arm. 

Chanyeol's lying across Yixing's loveseat this time. Yixing's writing away on who knows what when Baekhyun comes in. Chanyeol suddenly finds interest in the stray thread on the cushion when Baekhyun leans over the desk to give Yixing a quick kiss.

Not that Chanyeol didn't expect it, Yixing shoos him away to Sehun for the time being. 

"What's in the box?" Yixing asks, stacking his papers neatly to the side. "A gift?" 

"Of sorts," Baekhyun gestures for Yixing to go ahead and open it. 

Yixing's brows are already rising. "Didn't I--?" 

"You did," Baekhyun says smiling. "It's my favorite one. I know you like tea I figured we could share it," he watches Yixing unfold the surrounding silk to hold up the canister.

"I guess we could," Yixing's still a bit confused over the "gift," but he follows along well enough. 

"Do you know what else we could do?" Baekhyun's tipping forward and back onto his heel and forward onto his sole. "You did say you would show me the good sellers Hyung, perhaps in Changsha?" Baekhyun's looking just a little smug. "Maybe we could find a complimentary set~" 

Yixing just watches him. He smiles. "You want to go to Changsha with me?"

"Yes, Yixing, yes," Baekhyun says, holding out one hand for Yixing to take.

Yixing takes it.


End file.
